“Will she eat the kiwi and banana I left behind for snacks? Will he remember the sun hat I put under the changing table? And please, the pink sippy cup, not the blue one!” These were the anxious questions swirling in my head. It was my first time traveling away from my 9-month-old daughter, and to say I was a mess is an understatement.
Ironically, I was headed to the Mom 2.0 Summit, a place filled with incredible women, many of whom I imagined were juggling similar worries. The thought that they were managing it gave me a sliver of courage. “If they can do it, I can too,” I told myself, taking a deep breath as I boarded the plane.
Six hours later, I landed in sunny southern California. For the next five days, something remarkable happened: I focused on myself. I immersed myself in work, embraced learning and connecting with others, and most importantly, I allowed myself to let go of the everyday mom worries for a while.
Travel has this incredible power to transform you, but it can also bring you back to your core self. Now, as a mother, I realize that making time for these moments of self-rediscovery is more crucial than ever. The California sunshine and gentle sea breezes were exactly what I needed to reconnect with myself – me, the optimist; me, the mom; and me, the traveler.
Being away from my baby wasn’t easy, but it was undeniably good. It provided a much-needed break from the beautiful yet demanding routines of motherhood. If you’re a new mom contemplating your first solo trip, here are eight tips that helped me survive and even thrive while traveling away from my little one:
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Give Yourself Permission to Say “Yes.” Being apart from your child is emotionally challenging, often accompanied by waves of guilt. It’s vital to remind yourself that it’s perfectly okay, and even necessary, to take breaks. Time away isn’t selfish; it can actually make you a morePresent and patient parent when you return. Embrace the opportunity without excessive guilt.
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Acknowledge and Accept Your Emotions. It’s alright to feel overwhelmed. I discovered that once I admitted my anxiety and sadness about leaving, and allowed myself to cry a little, a weight lifted. Acknowledging your feelings is the first step to managing them. Don’t suppress your emotions; let them out in a healthy way.
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Equip Your Caregivers for Success. You are the expert on your baby. Before you leave, provide whoever is caring for your child with a detailed guide to what makes your baby’s days great. This could include favorite foods, nap schedules, bedtime routines, cherished books, and any other helpful tips. The more information you provide, the smoother the separation will be for everyone.
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Trust Your Caregivers to Succeed. Once you’ve shared your wisdom and written out schedules, it’s time to truly let go. Trust the person you’ve entrusted with your baby to care for them in their own way. This not only allows you to relax and recharge but also empowers your caregiver. You might even find that exposing your baby to a slightly different parenting style brings out new and delightful aspects of their personality, something fun to discover upon your return.
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Express Gratitude to Your Caregivers. A small gesture of appreciation goes a long way. Leave a Post-it note with a thank you and a smile on the diaper bag or fridge. Let your caregivers know how much you value their help. If they are providing care without payment, be sure to send a thoughtful thank-you note and a gift certificate to their favorite restaurant or store when you get back.
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Carry Reminders of Your Baby. During my conference, I often found myself looking at photos of my daughter on my phone. Seeing her smiling face was incredibly reassuring, reminding me that she was likely having fun with her dad and doing just fine. These visual reminders can significantly ease anxiety and keep you connected emotionally.
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Be Present in Your Travel Experience. It’s tempting to constantly wonder what your baby is doing, but resist that urge. Instead, use this precious time to focus on yourself and your trip. Whether it’s work, relaxation, or a mix of both, being present and engaged in your travel experience will be far more beneficial for your own well-being, and ultimately, for your baby when you return as a refreshed mom.
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Time Your Calls Strategically. While your schedule is disrupted by travel, your baby’s routine remains largely consistent. Avoid calling during typical fussy times like the 5 p.m. witching hour or bath time, as this might upset both your baby and make things harder for your caregiver. Instead, consider a morning call when things are generally calmer.
Do you have any additional tips for parents traveling away from their children for the first time? Share your wisdom in the comments below!
Anna Irwin works for National Geographic and lives in Washington, D.C., with her family.
